Reparations
by andy kay
Summary: Eli and Grace finally see the same future. But can one mistake neither will admit do more damage than good? PG-13 for drug references. Angsty, but all in all pretty much a good romance.
1. We Need to Clear the Air

This fanfiction is in script form. It is also my first O&A fiction, so bear with me. I wanted a E/G fanfic out there, even though there are a lot. What can I say? Though the show may have died, my love for it never shall. Oh well. Anyway, all I can ask for is reviews! Please, they are the food for a writer's soul.  
  
ANGLE: THE SAMMLER-MANNING HOUSEHOLD. WE FOCUS ON THE KITCHEN. LILY, ZOE, AND JESSIE HAVE EATEN THEIR BREAKFAST AND ARE SIMPLY SITTING DOWN TALKING, EACH ANIMATED. GRACE SITS AT THE TABLE, DISPONDENTLY WRITING IN HER NOTEBOOK. THERE IS STILL NO SIGN OF LIFE FROM THE MEN OF THE HOUSE. LILY HAS ABSENTLY BEEN WATCHING HER DAUGHTER, TAKING CAREFUL NOTE OF THE LACK OF VIBRANCE FOUND IN HER DAUGHTER. JESSIE NOTICES, TOO. ZOE, HOWEVER, STILL CONTINUES SPEAKING OF THE GOINGS-ON AT HER FRIEND'S BIRTHDAY PARTY COMING UP. LILY NOW RAISES UP FROM HER SEAT AT THE TABLE, TO SEARCH FOR HER HUSBAND. SHE STOPS, APPARENTLY REMEMBERING SOMETHING, AND TURNS TO GRACE.  
  
LILY: Grace?  
  
(Silence.)  
  
LILY: Grace?  
  
( A confused look of focus on Grace's face, she turns to Lily.)  
  
GRACE: ( Distractedly.) Yeah?  
  
LILY: ( Pointedly.) Grace, could you get Eli? He wanted to go in to the station today. I was going to take you both with me. Get you started on some of your writing.  
  
( A look of peril crosses Grace's face briefly. She hadn't planned on speaking to Eli today, or ever, for that matter.)  
  
LILY: Please.  
  
GRACE: All right. ( She rushes to the door, making her disdain obvious.) Eli! Eli Sammler, get out of bed! ( She knocks furiously.)  
  
(Silence.)  
  
GRACE: Eli, open up, or I'm coming in.  
  
(Silence.)  
  
GRACE: Fine. ( She opens the door. Eli is asleep. The look of disarray lays proof to Grace's fears. He had been drinking, and given the smell Grace recognized, he had been drinking a lot.)  
  
GRACE: Eli, get up, come on.   
  
(Eli stirs.)  
  
ELI: Huh? Grace? Wh-What time is it?  
  
GRACE: Six-thirty. ( She places a hand on her hip, and Eli knows that she is still angry.)  
  
ELI: Why are you waking me up at this hour?  
  
GRACE: Mom wanted you to go with her to the station today, I guess it was about that internship.  
  
ELI: Oh, yeah! (He rises quickly, surprising Grace. Immediately, he removed the torn beater he wore, searching for a nice undershirt. He looks lost, and Grace takes pity.)  
  
GRACE: What do you need?  
  
ELI: ( He looks both relieved and excited.) A T-shirt, and some clothes I bought. They are here somewhere. ( He searches about, while Grace pulls a T-shirt out of the drawer.)  
  
GRACE: Clean. Mom did the laundry. ( Eli smiles at her cautiously. She grabs a bag from the floor and dumps the clothes out on the bed.) A-ha! Wow, Eli.( On the bed are several pairs of slacks, ranging in colors from khaki to black. Also are many button-up dress shirts, all in light shades of white, olive, and blue. On the top are two dress belts, one brown and one black. It is now that she notices the new shoes by the door.)  
  
ELI: Does it all look nice? I mean... ( He looks at her, then closes the door.)  
  
GRACE: Yeah. Here you go, khaki slacks, green shirt, and brown belt. It'll give a good impression. ( There is still an awkwardness in the room, and Grace moves around Eli to open the door. He places a hand on her hand delicately.)  
  
ELI: I'm sorry. Not just for this, but everything. I wasn't there for you when you needed me. I apologize. There's nothing that I can do to make it up.  
  
GRACE: You lied, that hurt. But what hurt more is when I didn't see your face, cheering me on. I can't explain why, but it hurt. ( He looks down, not letting go of her hand. She relaxes her own and steps closer to him.)  
  
ELI: Grace, that's just what I do. I hurt people. Every person that loved me, everyone I love, they get hurt. ( He looks sullen.)  
  
GRACE: Eli, no more excuses. ( She laces her fingers with his comfortingly. This gesture is meant as one of friendship, but both shudder with desire from the touch.)  
  
ELI: The hair. ( He walks to the mirror, fumbling nervously with the bottles of hair gel and cologne.)  
  
GRACE: Yeah. Here, get dressed. ( She hands him the slacks and shirt, and for the first time that morning, she realizes that he was only in his boxers. Images that she had pushed aside since that fateful day push through her mind, but she ignores them. Eli is watching her, almost trying to figure out what is going on inside her head. As he begins buttoning the shirt, Grace takes over.)  
  
ELI: Last I checked, I could button a shirt.  
  
GRACE: You and I both know your motor functions are off. Speaking of which, black coffee. Your going to have a hangover.  
  
ELI: Nah. (He sways a little going to put on the belt. Again, Grace helps him. Eli is now dressed, looking very professional, but still youthful with the shirt kind of unbuttoned. He is holding his necklace with the lock. Grace puts it on her neck. Eli laughs.)  
  
GRACE: We'll switch roles for today.  
  
ELI: Want some black eyeliner?  
  
GRACE: That worries me. ( Both laugh. Eli looks at her, and crushes Grace in a tight hug.)  
  
ELI: I am so sorry. The last thing I needed to do was alienate my best friend. I love you.  
  
GRACE: I love you too. ( Again, images of a night Eli apparently does not remember flash through her head.)  
  
B/W GRACE: I never thought that I would do something like that. Of course, I never planned on getting high with Eli, either.  
  
ELI: What if she doesn't remember? Way to go, Sammler, you probably scarred her for life.  
  
ELI: So, whaddaya say? Let's go show off to the world. ( Jubilantly, he wraps an arm around her shoulder as she place hers around his waist.)  
  
GRACE: Well, we can show off to the station. I have to change, though.  
  
ELI: A'ight. How about I drive you there? Lily won't have to wait.  
  
LILY: No driving you two? I knew I loved this boy. ( Eli and Grace laugh, smiling heartily at one another. Lily glances oddly at the two, more than perplexed by their behavior. Zoe is still oblivious, and Jessie is still very aware of the changes. Rick has left, leaving two forms of transportation.)  
  
JESSIE: So, Zoe and I are staying here, party time!  
  
GRACE: Yeah, Mom, Eli and I will be there in a little while.  
  
ELI: Yeah, we will be careful, yadda, yadda. (He rolls his eyes dramatically, while Grace stifles a laugh. Lily kisses Grace on the forehead and squeezes Eli's shoulder.)  
  
LILY: I love you guys. ( A vague blush.)  
  
ELI: Bye, Lily. You're going to be late. 


	2. Here We Are Again

Okay, so it took me a while, and I'm sorry! (Begging for forgiveness.) Here is the next installment, and we find out a few more things about our favorite twosome. And, I leave you as always, read and review! ENJOY!  
  
(They are now at the station.)  
  
LILY: Well, we now have a surprise for everyone. Call-in time. And, we have to teen experts with us today.  
  
ELI: That's right. For once, I am going to be the expert on things. And, with my beautiful co-host, we will try and give you advice on any situation you have.  
  
GRACE: This is Grace Manning.  
  
ELI: And Eli Sammler.  
  
BOTH: And we're waiting for your call.  
  
ELI: ( The phone rings.) And we have Sam on line one. Whatcha got, Sam?  
  
SAM: Well, my best friend and I, we kind of hooked up, but she never talks about it. It's like she doesn't remember, or doesn't want to. The thing is, I'm in love with her, and until then, I thought that she was, too. What do I do?  
  
ELI: Man, that sucks. But, my advice is, bring it up. Tell this girl that you didn't mean what happened to be nothing. Tell her how you feel.  
  
GRACE: I agree. Let her know that you aren't just another guy. Don't let her slip away. ( Grace and Eli glance at each other, both thinking the same thing.)  
  
SAM: Okay, thanks.  
  
ELI: And, we're ready for the next caller.  
  
( Switch to the house. Eli and Grace are in his room, and Eli is trying to learn a song. He begins to sing.)  
  
He spent his whole life being too young to live the life that's in his dreams.  
  
At night he lays awake...  
  
Grace, we need to talk. ( His outburst startles her. He sits the guitar down.)  
  
GRACE: What about?  
  
ELI: I remember. I tried not to say anything, but I can't help it.  
  
GRACE: Eli, what happened, it was a mistake.  
  
ELI: Grace we ...  
  
GRACE: I know what we did, Eli! I was there, too! ( She is clenching her teeth. Eli looks down, and, almost instantly, looks back up. Without warning, he kisses her, and she simply falls into his embrace. Automatically, they fall back on the bed, and Grace begins to remove Eli's shirt. It is now that Eli's friend, Coop comes in. Eli has forgotten that he invited Coop over. Coop sees Eli on top of someone and jumps, startling the pair.)  
  
COOP: Whoa, sorry man, have you thought about a sock on the door. Or a sign that says: "Keep Out!"?  
  
GRACE: Coop!  
  
COOP: Grace. Dude, your step-sister, man that's just...  
  
ELI: ( Grabbing the shirt Grace had peeled off him.) Coop, you can't say anything. If Lily finds out...  
  
COOP: What, that you scored on her daughter. Yeah, you're pretty much dead. How long have you guys been...  
  
GRACE: I so do not want to go there.  
  
ELI: Grace, I. (The door closes.) I love you. ( He whispers. Not quietly enough, because Coop hears.)  
  
COOP: Whoa, I need to sit down. You didn't tell me that you were in love with your step-sister. ( Eli ran a hand through his disheveled hair.)  
  
ELI: Yeah, well, I just told myself it, man. Geez, what am I going to do?  
  
( The scene fades from Eli and Coop.) 


	3. A Startling Revelation

( THE RADIO STATION. LILY SITS AT HER DESK, LOOKING AT FAMILY PICTURES. ONE OF THEM IS FROM THE WEDDING, OF THE WHOLE GROUP, AND SEVERAL ARE OF THE VARIOUS KIDS IN THE PAST. THE ONE THAT CATCHES HER EYE THE MOST IS ONE OF ELI AND GRACE. IT IS AT THE WEDDING, THE TWO OF THEM DANCING.)

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LILY: I never noticed just how, how perfect they looked. Well, I knew they would. Grace, though, Grace is never going to know how to truly love. The two people she had a chance with were both unnattainable. (Looks at the camera, basically in tears.)

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STATION ATTENDANT: Hey, Lily, you have a call on line two. Jessie, I think? (The young man exits leaving a puzzled Lily behind. She pick up the phone.) Hello?  
  
JESSIE: Oh my God!  
  
LILY: Jessie, honey, what is it?  
  
JESSIE: That, that Mr. Dimitri just got arrested!  
  
LILY: What!? ( Lily almost falls out of her chair.)  
  
JESSIE: He raped one of his students. They were trying to keep it quiet, but it's all over the news. He's got, like a twenty thousand dollar bail.  
  
LILY: Why in the... Oh, hi Lou. (Her boss walks in. A grave look is on his face.) Jessie, I'll call you back, 'kay?  
  
JESSIE: Sure, I just thought you should now.  
  
LILY: Thanks, sweetie. ( She hangs up the phone. She turns to Lou.) What is it?  
  
LOU: There are some things that are going to be said tomorrow, and I think you should know. (Lily is nervous now. Lou hands her a printout and her eyes grow wide.)

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LILY: I'm going to puke.

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LILY: When? I never knew. It couldn't be.  
  
LOU: Grace Manning is your daughter right? Wasn't that her and her boyfriend who came in? (Lily is too shocked to notice the boyfriend comment, or maybe the idea doesn't bother her so much. She just numbly nods.)

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LILY: My daughter is on the list of admitted rapes. She never said. Oh. My. God.

* * *

(Grace is sitting in Eli's room, hiding from the family. Nobody thinks she's in there.)  
  
GRACE: Now the whole city knows what a slut I am. I slept with him. Just once. It just seemed like a way to say goodbye. And now here I am, in my step-brother's bed. It wasn't rape, with Mr. Dimitri. I have to tell them that. He'll say it was, defend me. But I can't let him go like that. The other girls, maybe, but not me.  
  
ELI: ( He walks into the room, quietly, and pulls her up off the bed. He knows, but doesn't say anything. Just silently pulls her under the covers and wraps her in his arms. He pulls her head to his chest and finally speaks.) Grace? They all went out, looking for you, I guess. I kinda figured you'd be here. It wasn't rape, was it? (Grace only sniffles.) I'll stand beside you. You loved him, I get that. No one else understands, but I do. I--- I'm sorry, Grace. Maybe if I'd have been there, I could have helped you. He used you, it wasn't fair. But I can't judge, 'cause that's what I did. Used you as a shoulder, when it was convenient for me. And when I finally realized that I needed you, for real, I backed off and ran. (Grace sat up now, and latched her arms around his neck.)  
  
GRACE: It's my turn then. I need you, Eli. I need to be with you, more than ever. It's not taking advantage, it's two people finally feeling. (When she kissed him, Eli didn't fight it, only pulled her tight against him. He made no refusal as she slowly pulled their clothes off. In fact, he seemed to be in agreeance the whole night.) 


	4. Changes Are Looming

It's been awhile, I know. I was forced to put some sort of social life into my meaninglessly pathetic existence. That meant no time to be on the computer. But, I'm back with the aftermath, and a big twist!!   
P.S. Sorry it's so short.  
  
(The next morning, Grace awakes in Eli's arms. He is looking at her with a concerned look on his face. He brushes her hair out of her face.  
  
ELI: Are you all right? I mean, with everything?  
  
GRACE: I have to tell the lawyers that he didn't rape me.  
  
ELI: Grace, it's not going to help him. I mean, you were only seventeen, they might still consider it statutory rape.  
  
GRACE: I didn't even think.  
  
ELI: Grace, I mean, were you guys, you know, careful? (Grace gets a scared look in her eyes. Eli can see through them, and he knows. God help him, he knows.) How late are you?  
  
GRACE: Just a week.  
  
ELI: Do you want to buy a home test?  
  
GRACE: Oh God, what if I am? Then, what if it's yours, or his?  
  
ELI: It won't be mine. We used protection both times. (She gives him a look.) Oh, God, what are we gonna do?  
  
GRACE: Well, in the time period it would be his.  
  
ELI: Grace, he did, kind of, you know, take advantage of the situation.  
  
GRACE: I know, but I didn't help. ( Eli hung his head as he go up. His hair was a mess, but still there was some resemblance of happiness in his eyes.)  
  
ELI: Gracie, you don't understand us guys. It's like what I just did-  
  
GRACE: Now, hold on! Eli, I needed this, it wasn't about you. It was about trying to tell the difference between a mistake and, I don't know, something else. Okay, I had something really poetic, but now I don't. Eli. Come on. That night here, we were out of it. It was a mistake. With Augustus, we were desperate and needed to say goodbye. It was a mistake. Last night, (he hung his head even further, happiness disappearing from his eyes and being replaced by fear. She looked him in the eyes and stood on the bed.) Last night was about finally having something go right in what seems to be a very screwed up world. It wasn't a mistake. ( As they kiss, Eli's door opens. They find themselves looking into a pair of very angry eyes.)  
  
And, I had to leave a cliffhanger. Who walked in, bonus points for whoever guesses it!  
  
I know you hate me, so review! Please! Reviews give me energy. Energy to write more chapters faster. (HINT HINT) 


	5. Needing to Explain

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Okay, after a long break, I am back! Please, please, hold your applause. You know the deal, I don't own Once and Again, Julia Whelan, Shane West, nope, none of it's mine.

I want to thank the reviewers for the last chapter, I was the most uncertain about it, but you guys really helped me to see it was good.

Marianne-Thanks, and I kinda threw that in as a twist. It's my world right?

Ry-ry-Thank you. Let's just say you guessed it right, eventually, and I'm agreeing with you on the Shane West bit.

Jake- Thanks, I've just always wrote in script format, it get to be a bit more stuctured. And I like the way you think, the story having to be more interesting and a little twisted.

Jen- Thanks a lot. And I'm glad you're thinking about the future of the story. It means it might actually be okay.

EGFAN74- Glad you're thinking about who it might have been. Thanks.

Cara-Wow! You saw right into the entire basis for my story, and sort of predicted part of my next chapter. Thanks a lot.

Anyway, on with the story…

What, you thought I wouldn't make you wait a little more?

ELI: Um, Mom, what are you doing here? (He and Grace had jumped apart quickly, all futile, as the anger in Karen's eyes is replaced by confusion, embarassment, and, was that happiness?)

GRACE: Karen, um, hi. We were just-I was just-I was just going to crawl in a hole. (She sits on the bed. Karen only notices now that she is wearing an old rock band t-shirt, obviously Eli's, and Eli is only in a pair of sweatpants. She is not usually a suspicous person, but it didn't take a top lawyer to figure out what was going on.)

KAREN: Eli, I came to get your lazy butt out of bed. But it seems Grace beat me to it. (Karen smirks at Grace, who blushes deeply, and Eli lightly laughs at his mother's unusually coy statement.) I told Rick I'd come straight in here, he was in a hurry. Lily is already gone. She took Zoe with her. So, if you don't want Jessie in on, whatever this is, I suggest being out of bed in-(Jessie steps into the kitchen, her feet echoing on the linoleum. She calls for Eli.)

JESSIE: ( Off shot.) Eli!

GRACE: I want her to know. (She calmly walks out of the room before Eli could protest. He turns to his mother.)

ELI: Did you need something?

KAREN: You're just going to let her tell Jessie?

ELI: We have nothing to hide. So…

KAREN: Yeah, I saw the news. I want to talk about representing her case.

ELI: Why did you come to me?

KAREN: To find out any details I need to know before I ask her if she wants me to represent her. It's not the kind of lawyer I am, but this is_ wrong_. This is my family.

ELI: Family. God. (He didn't realize he said it out loud. Grace came back into the room, and they heard a door close upstairs. Jessie was probably calling Katie. Karen looked at Grace, seeing a vulnerability in Grace's eyes she probably wasn't used to.)

KAREN: Grace. I was just telling Eli. I need to know everything. This is going to get nasty, and I want to represent your case.

GRACE: Everything? (Suddenly the world closed in around her. She ran to Eli's bathroom and threw up, barely making it to the toilet. Karen became concerned, and as she and Eli helped Grace rinse her face and mouth, she felt of Grace's forehead.

KAREN: You're not running a fever, your eyes look relatively clear. What's the matter? (Grace panicked.)

GRACE: It's just, a lot to process.

KAREN: Mm-hmm. (She looks at Eli.)

B/W: KAREN: It's so painfully clear that she's in pain. And I get that she needs someone, but Eli? He's as confused as she is. I just wonder if they're setting themselves out to fall. I try really hard to want what's best for everyone, but part of me knows that they see each other a different way. It was obvious when I first knew Grace. She saw something in Eli, that no one else saw. And it made him feel like he was worth it. But, seeing so much into a person's soul can cause a lot of damage. I know. (She looks down into her hands, at her left hand, where there is no ring. It's obvious that Karen still sees that ring, though.

ELI: Mom, can we do this later? (He is trying to be supportive of both of them, but it's hard.)

KAREN: No, Grace, I think I know what's going on, but I need you to tell me. No notes, no tape recorder, I need to know. (She puts her hand on Grace's arm, and she saw staring back at her a Grace that everyone thought had long since disappeared, a fearful Grace.)

GRACE: I think I may be pregnant.


	6. Indecisive Decisions

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This one is kinda short, I apologize. There's been a lot going on with me, and I haven't had time to update, but I'm back, and I _will_ be updating, I promise. Just review it, let me know. I'm not gonna try to bribe you, ask you for a certain number of reviews, I've been told it doesn't work, so, does cold hard cash? HA! But, I am not above begging, I haven't had a review in forever, please!

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Okay, Once and Again: not mine, characters: not mine, storyline: mine, Shane West: mine in my dreams. No, seriously, on a beach in…Oh sorry.

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Also, if any readers are into 7th Heaven, Buffy, or Power Rangers, I have fics running on all of those. 7th Heaven: Undeserving and It's Not Easy, Buffy: Moving On, Return to Normalcy, and If I Told You, Power Rangers: Returning. Summaries on each. Just had to do a little shameless self-promotion.

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Later, Eli is on the phone, speaking with someone who he apparently does not like. No one else is around, but Grace is supposed to be there soon. Eli only hoped that this idiot would get off the phone.

ELI: Listen, you've done enough damage. Now, I don't know how you got the chance to call here, but you _will never_ do it again. ( He doesn't hear the door close, or Grace walk up behind him.) You've done enough damage, and I _know_ you don't think you're going to have a chance now. I'd give you a suggestion where you need to go, but my feeling is that you're not good enough for it. You _used_ her. She was insecure, and you thought you'd prey on that. _No more_. You touch her, speak to her, you even _think her name_, I will kill you. ( He hung up, the tension evident in his figure.)

GRACE: You know, you do that big brother thing too well.

ELI: Oh, sorry. He just-

GRACE: No, it's okay. I just wanted to threaten him myself. (She sits down at the table.) We need to talk. (He sits in front of her, his hands on the table. She puts one hand on his, and grasps it lightly, like a friend.) I love you, you know that, right? (He nods, but lets her continue.) The doctor said that it's positive. I am pregnant. And the baby is August's. But I won't tell him that.

ELI: You won't have to tell anyone. I don't care what the test says, Grace. I'll take full responsibility for the child, okay?

GRACE: (Nodding, calmly.) I figured you'd say that. And I want you there, by my side. My best friend, how could you not be a part of my child's life? But that's not all. Eli, as much as being with you helps me, I need to focus on the baby. And our family. We can't be together. You know that. Not right now. Maybe after things settle down, if we haven't found someone else. You know? I love you, and I don't doubt you love me, but I'll just heal as well with you being my friend. (There are slight tears in her eyes.)

ELI: So, just friends? I'll be your shoulder? What? Am I that much of a failure to you? (He stands, his posture very defensive, but he speaks quietly.) You don't want me to be the father of this child?

GRACE: No, I want you to be the uncle. Because I want to raise this child on my own. Because he or she doesn't have a real father. Uncle Eli will be the only true role model for their life. (She rises as well.) Eli, it's too weird. I do love you, and for so long you were all I've focused on, but…

ELI: So, you're going to tell (he coughs) our family that you're pregnant with his kid? God, you can't.

GRACE: What am I supposed to say? Huh, Eli! What am I going to do? You have some big plan? Tell me! Cause I'm totally lost! I'm asking you now, Eli. I can't pick you up anymore. I've fallen!

ELI: (He looks down, but he's sure of what he's saying. He mumbles quietly, but calmly.) Tell them it's mine. We don't have to be together, just say we hooked up, and the baby's mine.

GRACE: And what Eli? Let them kick you out? Kick _me_ out?!

ELI: My mom knows that you're pregnant, my dad will ask her. She knows how we feel about each other, she _caught_ us for God's sakes! No problems, Grace. For once, things can work out for us. We can raise this child. I'll be there, you know that. I'm done with, Grace. I'm tired of screwing up, hurting people I love. I won't do that anymore.

(Grace turns and begins to walk away. Quietly, she whispers.)

GRACE: It's not me I'm afraid of you hurting, Eli, it's yourself. (She leaves, and Eli stands at the table, slight tears in his eyes, not because of what she said, but because he knew she was right. About everything.)

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Review, maybe Eli won't cry…

Wait, Shane West is crying…

What am I, inhuman and cruel?!


	7. Playing For Redemption

-1**I'm Back! I'm BACK! Insert happy dance here Sorry, I'm just really glad to be back. Although since it has been a year…I hope someone's still reading. If you are out there somewhere, please review. Let me know if I shouldn't upload the chapters I've written during my posting hiatus. There are quite a few. But the story's still WIP. **

**I've got a lot in the works, so if you like the shows _Buffy, Angel, Power Rangers, Crossing Jordan, So Weird, In A Heartbeat, General Hospital, _or my favorite_, Smallville- _keep an eye out. I've got a few in the mix for all of the above. Maybe a couple of others as well, I haven't decided. **

**I promise that the script format changes quickly. Sorry, it was just a lot to change and I wanted to get these up as soon as I got back.**

**ELI: (Slams his fists on the table hard.) Screwed up again! Ugh! (He walks back to his room and slammed the door. For effect, he kicked it once it was closed. He slammed down on his bed.) What're you gonna do now man? 'Cause you've pretty much covered all the bases. (He looks at his dresser, and the drawer where he used to keep his stash. He'd emptied most of it out, but he knew there was some left. And he'd never felt more like getting wasted in his life. But he couldn't move, and his eyes wouldn't leave the drawer.)**

**WE SEE THE FRONT DOOR NOW, LOOKING SERENE. JESSIE ENTERS, RUSHED, AND RUNS UP THE STAIRS. SHE DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING, BUT THE LOOK ON HER FACE SAYS VOLUMES.**

**JESSIE: Grace! Grace! (Runs to Grace's room, pounding. Grace opens the door.) You need to see the news. (They run downstairs, and Eli is waiting.)**

**ELI: What's going on?**

**GRACE: Turn on the TV. (She sits down and he complies. Jessie sits down to the right of Grace and Eli sits on her left. On the screen we see Mr. Dimitri. He is talking about his case, that he plans on suing the girls' parents for false accusations. He claims there is no proof of his actions.)**

**ELI: No proof. I'll give him proof. That's why he called! (Eli stands up.) I swear, I'm gonna…This isn't live is it? (He is looking out the window.)**

**JESSIE: No, why? (She tries to see what Eli sees.)**

**ELI: Take Grace upstairs. Grace, I want you guys to lock the door behind me.**

**GRACE: He's here? (Eli only nods. Grace grabs Jessie's hand and they walk to the stairs. They stop, but Eli doesn't see that. He walks out the door, to August's car.)**

**OUTSIDE, IN THE DRIVEWAY.**

**ELI: What are you doing here? Because it better be a good reason. (August steps out.)**

**DIMITRI: I need to speak with Ms. Manning.**

**ELI: No, you need to leave! You've done enough!**

**DIMITRI: You actually believe her? Please, all the lies, this is so…**

**ELI: No! You don't get to do that! You hurt her! You're gonna pay for all those girls whose lives you stole. People like you, they pay. (He is standing close to Dimitri, staring the older man down.)**

**DIMITRI: I'm going to talk to Grace. (He moves past Eli, who grabs his arm. Dimitri swings, and Eli ducks the punch. He shoves Dimitri against his own car, knocking the breath out of the former teacher. He punches Dimitri in the face, but doesn't stop. Grace is looking outside now, and she runs to stop Eli, the last thing they need is Eli getting charged with assault. But she isn't the first one there. Rick has pulled up, and is pulling away his son.)**

**ELI: I thought I already made this clear! You touch her, you look at her, you even _think her name_, I'll _kill_ you! You think I'm kidding?**

**DIMITRI: What defense are you? A street bum? Amounting to nothing? You've crossed a line.**

**ELI: I crossed a line! You raped her! You got- (He stops himself. Only he and Grace realize what he almost said, and Grace is flustered. He continues, cautiously.) You got away with too much. I'll bring you down somehow.**

**DIMITRI: Well, I guess I'll see you in court.**

**ELI: You better hope that's the only time.**

**"E, come on. Let him go. Let's go, son. You, you're going to want to leave. And I suggest now. Because _her_ father is in the car behind me. He sees you, and you're dead. And I'll watch." Rick's eyes were colder than they'd ever been. As August walked off, Jake pulled up, but August's car was gone before Jake could get out.**

**A week later, Eli is preparing for the gig Coop has lined up for the band. He is in his room practicing.**

_**"Breathe in right away**_

_**Nothing seems to fill this place**_

_**I need this every time**_

_**So take your lies, get off my case**_

_**Someday I will find**_

_**A love that flows through me like this…"**_

**"Geez, this has to work." He shuffled through his pages. The lyrics filled the book. He finds the page he was looking for. He smiles grimly, that is the song he wants to begin with. He continues practicing for that evening.**


	8. Performance Anxiety

-1**So this is my was of getting to include a song without having to say that it was a songfic. Not that there is anything wrong with those, I state in defense that I have written a few. Plus we can all just imaging Shane West performing. I bought Season Two on DVD and couldn't get over that scene so I had to include a few. At least I changed it from script, which kind of makes me sad because I had to remove a lot of details-like background music. Anyway: read, review, relax!**

**The club wasn't completely packed, but to Grace's pleasant surprise, there were quite a few people there. Eli and Coop were talking with a tech on the lights for the show, and the rest of the band was onstage setting up equipment. She saw that Eli had both of his guitars set up to go, something he rarely did. Finally, she and Jessie found their seats with some girls from school. Grace found herself comfortable, luckily, none of the girls were treating her any different. She had a feeling that Jessie was behind that.**

**The rest of the family was sitting nearby, but Jessie and Grace wanted front row. Even Rick had managed to come. Coop and Eli went back onstage, and the stage lights dimmed. The noise quieted down as Eli walked to the mike.**

**"Thank you to everyone for being here tonight. We're Anti-Inflammatory, and we've got quite a few songs for you tonight. This first one is a personal favorite of mine, and I'd love it if you enjoyed it to. This is for my family. _All of you." Apparently_ he was including Grace, because he looked straight at her.**

**"_Looking back at me, _**

_**I see that I never really got it right.**_

_**I never stopped to think of you.**_

_**I'm always wrapped up in things I cannot win.**_

_**You are the antidote that gets me by:**_

_**Something strong, like a drug that gets me hi-gh!**_

_**What I really meant to say **_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way**_

_**I am.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**What I really meant to say **_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way **_

_**I am.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**I never meant to be so...**_

_**Cold to you!**_

_**I'm sorry about all the lies.**_

_**Maybe in a different light,**_

_**You could see me stand on my own again.**_

_**Cause now I can se-e-e!**_

_**You are the antidote that got me by:**_

_**Something strong, like a drug that got me hi-gh!**_

_**What I really meant to say**_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way**_

_**I am.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**What I really meant to say**_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way**_

_**I am.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**I never meant to be so co-o-ld!**_

_**I never really **_

_**Wanted you to see**_

_**The screwed up side of me**_

_**That I keep **_

_**Locked inside of me**_

_**So deep.**_

_**It always seems to get to me.**_

_**I never really **_

_**Wanted you to go.**_

_**So many things you should've known.**_

_**I guess what I mean is just know:**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**  
What I really meant to say **_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way**_

_**I am.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**What I really meant to say **_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way**_

_**I am**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

_**I never meant to be so cold."**_

**Eli whispered the last words, staring directly at his family, mostly Rick and Grace, the two people he failed the most in his life. He stepped back from the mike, and played a few lead riffs to cool down. The rest of the guys prepared for the next song, and Eli switched guitars.**

**"I usually don't play this guitar with the band, so this is a good experience for me. _This _song is really special, and it goes to my best friend. You know who you are."**

**_"Breathe in right away_**

_**Nothing seems to fill this place**_

_**I need this every time**_

_**So take your lies, get off my case**_

_**Someday I will find**_

_**A love that flows through me like this**_

_**And this will fall away**_

_**This will fall away**_

_**You're getting closer**_

_**To pushing me off of life's little edge**_

_**'Cause I'm a loser**_

_**And sooner or later you know I'll be dead**_

_**You're getting closer**_

_**To holding the rope and taking the fall**_

_**'Cause I'm a loser**_

_**Well, I'm a loser**_

_**Yeah**_

_**This is getting old**_

_**Well, I can't break these chains that I hold**_

_**My body's growing cold**_

_**There's nothing left of this mind on my soul**_

_**Addiction needs a pacifier**_

_**The buzz of this poison's taking me higher**_

_**And this will fall away**_

_**This will fall away**_

_**You're getting closer**_

_**To pushing me off of life's little edge**_

_**'Cause I'm a loser**_

_**And sooner or later you know I'll be dead**_

_**You're getting closer**_

_**To holding the rope and taking the fall**_

_**'Cause I'm a loser**_

_**Well, I'm a loser…"**_

**Grace watched as Eli played, praying that the song didn't mean what she thought it did. Somehow, she knew that this was Eli's goodbye, and she only hoped that it wouldn't be forever.**

_**"You're getting closer**_

_**To pushing me off life's little edge**_

_**'Cause I'm a loser**_

_**And sooner or later you know I'll be dead**_

_**You're getting closer**_

_**To holding the rope and taking the fall**_

_**'Cause I'm a loser**_

_**You're getting closer**_

_**To pushing me off life's little edge**_

_**'Cause I'm a loser**_

_**And sooner or later you know I'll be dead**_

_**You're getting closer**_

_**To holding the rope and taking the fall-and takin'**_

_**'Cause I'm a loser."**_

**Eli was in virtual tears now, and he stared at Grace in the front row. Jessie caught the look they shared, and almost cried herself. ****_'I love you, goodbye.' _He mouthed those words to Grace and she nodded, not hesitating to let the tears fall. Jessie reached across the table a held the hand of the girl she felt was her sister.**

**The band continued playing, and Grace was pleasantly surprised when Eli sang the song she had helped him write, and gave her name as the credit. She sang along, knowing the words better than anyone in the audience. He looked genuinely happy, and Grace was glad for that.**

**After an exhausting evening, the entire family, plus Coop and Katie had retired to the house. Eli sat on the mantle, fidgeting, a sure sign he had something to say. And because of this, the entire room had taken to studying him. Except Coop, who apparently already knew what was coming, and Grace who expected it.**

**"I'm leaving," Eli suddenly announced.**

**"What?" Rick jumped.**

**"Next week, the band is going on the road. I'm leaving, too. Coop's uncle works on a breakout concert tour group. He's invited us. The thing is…"**

**"What is it, E?"**

**"The tour's in Europe. I'll be gone for at least a year."**

**"A year?" Grace asked this time. She clenched her jaw as if she was trying not to scream or cry.**

**"At least," Eli responded. He stood now, only to find Grace standing as well. The last thing he wanted was to fight, especially with everyone there. He was fairly certain that they had managed to keep their secret.**

**"So, you'll miss it?"**

**"Miss what? Grace, what are you talking about?" Lily asked. The focus had shifted away from Eli to her. She looked to Eli for help, and closed her eyes. Finally she took a deep breath, preparing to tell everyone.**

**"You guys all know about Mr. Dimitri, right? Well, there's more."**

**"More? Grace, tell us."**

**"I didn't know how, and I still don't."**

**"What? Grace!" Lily looked at her daughter. Again Grace looked at Eli, she couldn't say it.**

**"She's pregnant." And it wasn't Eli who said it, it was Coop.**

**"What?" Lily screamed.**

**"You told him, Eli?" Grace faced at Eli.**

**"What does Eli have to do with this?" Rick rose, raising his voice as well.**

**"Hold on! No, I didn't tell Coop. And how _do_ you know?" Eli asked his friend.**

**"Well, it's the only thing that makes sense."  
"Answer my question, E. What do you have to do with it?" Rick faced his son.**

**"Nothing, and everything at the same time. Eli is my best friend. So I told him. He offered to help me out."**

**"How?"**

**"I was going to claim paternity. But, that would turn out weird, so…"**

**"It's Dimitri's," Rick continued.**

**"You aren't going to tell him? Right?" Jessie spoke.**

**"No, I'm not going to tell him, but I really want to hear more about E," Grace answered, both not wanting to detail the situation, and too focused on Eli's sudden announcement.**

**"I have to leave. I'm sorry, all of you. I need this, I'll call, and e-mail. Keep me posted. I'm packing what I need, other than that, I'll have people by to deliver it to my new place. In San Francisco."**

**"San Francisco? What?" Grace was a little more than upset now.**

**"I have to do this, Grace. You, of all people, should understand."**

**"You're running away, Eli!"**

**"It's not like I have a reason to stay here. I can stay in touch with my family no matter where I am!" Eli reasoned. **

**"You did just what I said. It's why-"**

**"Why you pushed me away? Because _I _was the screw-up! Because I'd only hurt you, right! Maybe it's time to explain to everybody what the problem is, Grace. Because I've done enough of keeping _your_ secrets," he replied. His temper was getting the best of him.**

**"My secrets? Don't _even_, you were more than a little involved," she responded sarcastically.**

**"Now you say that? If something goes wrong, yeah, I'm there. You really _are_ messed up," he remarked, scoffing.**

**"Don't give me that attitude, Eli. It doesn't work on me. You forgot that. And as far as keeping secrets go, we're pretty even on that scale!" Neither noticed that the family was watching their match.**

**"Hold on! You two want to explain what is going on?" Lily's unusually shrill voice sounded.**

**"It's over!" Jessie yelled. Everyone was shocked to hear her so emotional.**

**"Jessie…"Grace warned. She had a look on her face, and Grace knew she was about to spill everything.**

**"No. I'm laying all the cards on the table. Grace is in love with Eli, he's in love with her. They were together, she broke up with him when he offered to be the father. She's pregnant. Eli's leaving, a lot because of the way _you," she_ looked at Rick, "make him feel like he's nothing. Not to mention that the first person to actually have faith in him seemingly gave up on him," she finished, now looking at Grace.**

**"I _never_ gave up on you, E. Why would you think that?"**

**"Come on, Grace. Why else wouldn't you want me? After all it took us. Everything we went through, and it was thrown away."**

**"For this, Eli! Maybe it's the way it had to be. The tables are turned. Dramatic irony! Something ironically poetic!"**

**"Poetic? This is-"Eli stopped before he said anything more. She was right. He needed to leave, and now she knew it. He needed to leave because she didn't accept him. And she didn't accept him because he couldn't, he wasn't good enough yet. Going to Europe would be the thing he needed.**

**"Wow," Lily whispered.**

**"Just so you know, E. We _are _proud of you. I may not agree with the fact that you don't want a conventional job, but this makes you happy. And that makes _me_ happy. Makes _us_ happy."**

**"Yeah, I know, Dad, but I still need to do this."**

**"And as far as you and Grace…"**

**"I don't want to hear it, Mom," Grace said.**

**"Grace!" Rick hissed, shocked.**

**"I love him. Always will. We're not together anymore, and if we decide to later, it will happen. You trusted me before, and I may have lost it, but Eli isn't the same person you saw before."**

**"_I'm_ not the same. Not at all. You changed me, Grace. But until I can look in the mirror and like what I see, I can't be happy. My love for you hasn't changed."**

**"Well, I need to leave," Rick said, looking at the clock. He was obviously wanting to change the subject from the whispers of Eli and Grace. Not a single person had heard their final exchange, a good thing.**

**"Oh, yeah, you're meeting with the hotel owners. Good luck, sweetie," Lily said, kissing her husband quickly, still looking at Grace.**

**"So, Katie, _this_ is my family," Jessie kidded. Katie laughed with her, but she was concerned for her friend. She grasped her hand lightly, but Jessie pulled away. As Katie looked into her eyes, she realized Jessie's true problem. She felt guilty because she wasn't being honest with anyone.**

**Coop rose, knowing that now, more than ever, the family needed to be together. He spoke with Eli for a moment, then addressed Jessie.**

**"Take care, Jess. I'll be back next week to help E with his stuff."**

**"Bye Coop," Jessie hugged him. Katie started to get up.**

**"You need a ride, Katie? My guess is this is gonna be a serious family moment tonight."**

**"Yeah, thanks. Bye Jessie," she hugged Jessie tightly, not worried about reactions. Neither was Jessie, it seemed, because she returned the hug full-force.**

**They walked out to Coop's car, making small talk and he even opened her door for her. Katie was a little suspicious.**

**"I never knew," Coop whispered when they both were sitting in the car.**

**"Knew what?" Katie asked of Coop's sudden statement.**

**"That Jessie was gay," he stated simply. Katie's jaw dropped, and she almost choked.**

**"What?"**

**"I'm pretty observant. I'm not as dumb as I seem, and I saw the way you two looked at each other. I won't tell, she's obviously not out. But, you are, aren't you?" He started the car and began to back out of the driveway.**

**"Yeah, how did you-"**

**"It's easy to tell when a person is pretending not to be in love with someone. To feel their hurt when they know the person that they love is either taken or unattainable."**

**"Wow, do you have a personal experience?" Katie, too, was rather observant, and she had a theory.**

**"A little," Coop answered laconically.**

**"How long _have_ you been in love with Grace?" Now Coop's jaw dropped. He regained quickly.**

**"Not long. And I'm not really _in_ _love_ with her. I thought she was hot in high school, then I got to know her through Eli, and I started to like her. I wouldn't have hooked up with her, she's not my normal type. But, yeah, I had feelings for her."**

**"Had? When did you stop?"**

**"When I walked in on her and Eli…"he motioned his hands forward, letting the sentence drop. Surely Katie would fit the puzzle together.**

**"Whoa. I didn't know that they were sleeping together," Katie shrieked.**

**"Our little secret."**

_**"**_**One of many," Katie whispered as she and Coop drove away. She knew she'd certainly have a lot to think about.**

**Back in the house, Lily was staring her daughter and step-son down. Eli was fuming, panting from his rage. She knew better than to try to talk them down, Eli would probably only push them all away. And they needed more than ever to be a family at this point in time.**

**"Tonight, it's just about us. As a family. Let's not think about your leaving, Eli. Grace, we need some details. Such as when you were going to tell us."**

**"I planned on telling everyone, I just wasn't sure when." Grace walked away, taking a parting glance at Eli, leaving the conversation at an end.**

**That evening, everyone has finished dinner and is going about their own business. Plans have been made for going away celebrations for Eli, whereas Grace's pregnancy was absolutely not open for discussion. **

_**"**_**Are you ****_ever_ going to speak to me again?" Eli asked Grace when they were finally alone in the kitchen. She put the last glass in the cabinet and sat on the island.**

_**"**_**I don't know, E. I kept thinking you should tell me, but you did. I can't be mad at you for any reason. I can just…"she ventured****toward the one subject.**

**"Yeah, but I _need _to leave. You understand that, right?"**

**"I know. So let's make this about celebration. To our new lives. Put the problems aside."**

**"Deal, Grace." He knew she was fronting, so as her _brother_ he didn't debate.**

**Time went on, and the day before Eli was to leave finally came. Eli was up early, ready to leave, and say his goodbyes.**


End file.
